It’s not always easy to get your ex back and one of the hardest parts is actually contacting them for the first time after the break up. People often contact their ex in the wrong way and make the situation worse. The best approach is a subtle and slow one. To begin with give them space and leave it a few weeks before contacting them.

This will hopefully be enough time for any ghosts and animosity between the two of you to pass over. When the time comes to make contact with them a simple text message or email is enough. People often miss or don’t read emails so I think a text message would be better. The problem with emails is that most people don’t check them as often as they check their phone, plus legitimate emails can be lost amongst spam emails.

Just ask them how they are in the message, keep it simple and don’t put any pressure on them. If they reply then great, just see how things go and then eventually ask them if they would like to meet up for a catch up chat. If they don’t answer then leave it for a few days and then send them another message. You will look desperate and needy if start bombarding your ex with too many messages.

Some people have a knee jerk reaction when they don’t get a response within the first hour and send a load more messages. If your ex comes back to their phone and finds one message from you it’s enough to tell them that you’re still interested. If they find lots of messages from you it tells them you’re desperate.

If after a week you still aren’t hearing anything then you need to try and ring them. This should be the final attempt at getting in touch with them. If you don’t get hold of them and they don’t call back then you should take the hint that they’re avoiding you and move on gracefully. Not every relationship can be saved and while it’s not a nice to go through it’s something that you will just have to learn to live with.